Ep. 114: The Shadows That Are Sabotaging Your Coaching
Shadow Work, WTF? - A podcast by Caitlin Hosking

Categories:
Why Your Biggest Blocks Are Keeping Your Clients Stuck Too
This week, Caitlin and support coach Lurinda dive deep into the most common shadows that plague coaches - and how these patterns directly sabotage their ability to create transformative client experiences. From burnout cycles and abandonment wounds to perfectionism and the desperate need to prove themselves, they explore how these shadows create co-dependent relationships, surface-level sessions, and clients who never quite get the breakthrough they're seeking. This conversation offers the uncomfortable truth about why your own unintegrated shadows are the biggest barrier to your coaching effectiveness.
This episode is for you if:
- You find yourself filling every silence in coaching sessions because it feels uncomfortable
- You struggle with clients who seem overly agreeable or those who challenge your expertise
- You work harder than your clients do and feel resentment creeping into your practice
- You panic when clients ask questions you don't immediately know how to answer
What we'll cover:
- How the "lazy" shadow creates burnout cycles that keep coaches trapped in proving energy
- Why abandonment wounds lead to chameleon coaching that serves no one authentically
- The perfectionism trap that makes coaches talk too much and listen too little
- How to recognise when you're creating co-dependent relationships instead of empowered clients
Key Points and Timestamps:
01:19:00 - The Burnout Shadow
Lurinda shares how the "lazy" shadow drives coaches into exhaustion cycles, working constantly to prove they're not lazy, only to burn out and finally give themselves permission to rest.
10:43:00 - The Chameleon Effect
How abandonment wounds cause coaches to shape-shift for each client, creating unsafe containers where neither coach nor client can show up authentically.
22:25:00 - The Perfectionism Trap
Why coaches who fear being seen as "not knowing enough" end up dominating sessions, leaving clients feeling unheard and misunderstood.
29:26:00 - The Cracking Process
Lurinda describes how the Shadow Alchemy immersion allows coaches to move from rigid personas to authentic presence through being witnessed in their mess.
41:05:00 - Integration and Moving Forward
Practical advice for coaches who recognise these shadows in themselves, including how to discern between imposter syndrome and genuine skill gaps.
Resources Mentioned:
- Shadow Alchemy Certification: shadowalchemycoaching.com
- Next Shadow Alchemy immersion: July 4th-6th
- Follow Lurinda: @perspectivebylurinda
- Shadow Alchemy Coaching Academy: @shadowalchemycoachingacademy
Connect with Us:
Loved this episode? Share it with a fellow coach who needs this reality check. Tag us @shadowalchemycoachingacademy with your biggest takeaway.
If you're ready to face your coaching shadows in a container designed for transformation, the next Shadow Alchemy immersion happens July 4th-6th, and prices increase by $1000 after June 30th. This work isn't comfortable, but it's the difference between performing as a coach and actually being one. Apply at shadowalchemycoaching.com when you're ready to stop letting your shadows sabotage your sessions.